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Showing posts from January, 2020

The Life That Could Have Been

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A long-time friend of my father’s passed away today and, like most people, my reaction was sadness for his family followed by the thought of all of our own mortality. The life of my parents, friends, other loved ones and of course, myself. Death does that to us. It makes us pause for a little while.

Then, as my mind does most times, my initial thoughts lead me to others. My reflection then developed into me thinking about choices and how important they are, even when you don’t think they are. Choices.

You don’t realize how much one teeny tiny choice can affect your entire life. Your path. Your ENTIRE freakin’ life. We make them every day and don’t even give them a second thought.
Go left here instead of right. I want to eat this food. Sit here. Stand up. Sleep late. Sit on the couch all day. Go to work. Stay home. Work out or not work out. Take my medicine. Wash my hands. Have I turned you into a neurotic yet? LOL That is a lot of pressure there!

And then there is bigger choices that …

People that Drive You Nuts

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Let’s face it, there are just some people that you know that absolutely drive you nuts. Insane. Super annoying.
When you hear their voice, your soul rolls its eyes. They walk into a room and you can feel the dread sneak upon you and then it smacks you in the face.
This person could drive you batty for several reasons…whether it is because of how they act, their political stance, their voice, antics…whatever it is, it rubs you the wrong way. Ick. Worse than nails on a chalkboard.
Let me tell you how to alleviate that. 
Well, you could just stop having a relationship with that person and avoid them at all costs…BUT sometimes you can’t do that! What if they are family or a co-worker that you have to work with every day?
Here is my simple solution: Don’t focus on their flaws. Don’t hone in on the things about them that drive you freakin’ crazy. Try to look at them with love and from God’s eyes. Love through God’s eyes. Find something about them (yeah, I know it is difficult) that you do like a…

The Importance of Making Sure Your Home is Your Sanctuary

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With the exception of a beautiful hiking trail, my home is my sanctuary. It is a place of peace and calm. It is comfortable and filled with things that I think are beautiful. Things I love and things that I have collected over the years. Pictures. Memories. Smiles. Love.

When I come home from work, spent...I absolutely love coming to my home because it calms me. I know that my dogs will be waiting for me, wanting me to get on the ground with them so they can jump on me and kiss me. I know that it will be chaos free and warm. I know that I can wrap myself up in a blanket and enjoy a glass of wine outside on the back porch.

I keep it well maintained, neat and clutter free (for the most part). It’s comfortable and not too fancy. I  have made it to fit me.

This is important stuff here. All of us need our own sanctuary...somewhere we can come home to that we have actually made into our home. We need that place that calms us, comforts us and brings us peace.

I think back to my childhood and…

Who am I?

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I have this card that I use for a book mark that says simply, “Who am I?” I make sure that I see it every day as I write in my journal. Just seeing it makes me ask myself that question every day.

Who am I?

Was I someone that I could be proud of?
Did I do something good today?
Was I honest and kind?
Did I do something to help someone else?
Was I productive?
Did I show love?
Patience?
Did I have an open mind?
Were my actions good? Something that I was pleased with?
Did I allow myself to receive love?
Was I a good role model?
Did I make a positive change?
What did I learn?
Did I show gratitude?
What kind of person was I today?


It keeps me in check. I love that card.


Eyes That See

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Have we made the world so familiar that we don’t really see it anymore? I think that a lot of us do.

We go through our daily lives with blinders on and we don’t take the time to really look at what we see all around us. You see, our eyes are so powerful. They allow you to see the inner souls of others. The beauty in the world. God’s wonders. What a blessing it is to have eyes that can see this spectacular world we live in.

Even with all of this around us, most of us totally miss it because we aren’t being mindful of the present moment that we are in right now. And now....and now.

Now.

Believe it or not, the thoughts above woke me up at 3am and I have been itching all day to write about this cause its a really neat thing to think about.

I thought back to earlier that day. I was sick. Miserable and headed to the doctors. There were a flurry of contractors at my house working feverishly on my bathroom.  I drove to the doctors and then drove home. Sat on my chair and worked on projects. J…

Comfortably Uncomfortable

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There is something new in your life. Newness scares you. It is change.

In order to get there, you are going to trust that someone will be there waiting for you on the other side - hand out - to catch you as you take the giant faith leap across a chasm that seems like a mile wide. In reality, it isn’t...just seems that dang way though because in the valley below you can see snippets of the changes you are going to have to make to get there. Everything is so new. New experiences. Things are all so very disparate from the comfort that you are used to.

Ahhhh...being comfortable. It is nice to be in a place where everything is so familiar. You have security. Yeah, you know that the life you are living is filled with mediocrity. BUT...change would take too much effort. It’s too scary. So, instead of taking that leap to the upgraded 2.0 version of yourself that is sooo itching to break out and be free, you stay in your “comfort zone”, unwilling to make yourself uncomfortable.

“Too much uncer…

Just a Girl Working in a Man’s World

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Working in a World Filled With Dudes...How to Survive in a Male Dominated Industry.
Working in a mainly male dominated industry and succeeding greatly within it, carries an interesting dynamic and I am going to do my best to explain to you. How it feels. How to do it. How I found to act that works best. The good, the bad and the ugly. The reality. I am going to put it all out there for you.

First, I do have to say some of my core belief when it comes to women vs. men in the workplace. I do believe that there are jobs that mostly men should do and vice versa. Military combat. Highly physical things that require a lot of strength... "man jobs." I don’t believe that women should play with men on the NFL field. Stuff like that. Men are just better suited for it. That is reality. Anything or any career that involves your brain is fair play and for anyone. Man or woman. It is a simple as that. I also don’t consider myself to be a feminist. So that is not what this is all about. I …

Love and Action

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I used to brag about being the best multitasker in the universe (so I thought). In my line of work- like many others-  problems, phone calls, email, text messages, constant interruptions etc. come at me 1000 mph and they don’t stop all day long. Reality.

I don’t value the ability to multitask anymore. I have learned that multitasking is actually not a good thing. Being present is.

Now, don’t get me wrong here...what I am about to talk about isn’t easy to put into practice. It is a daily struggle of mine. However, when I do put it into play, things change for the better. I am able to accomplish more, help more people and feel more fulfilled in my work. By being present.

What does that mean?

Being present in a moment, concentrating on one thing at a time...whether that be a person in front of you, a phone call that you are on, a file that I am working on, a problem in front of me...and really really listening, thinking and understanding helps me be a better servant. I actually get more

Beautiful on the Outside

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Picture a beautiful woman. A picture you have seen as you are scrolling on Facebook or Instagram and you think to yourself, “Dang, this person has it all. She is happy and beautiful and life looks so perfect.”

A true picture of perfection because that it the version that she wants you to see.

Inside though, her life - and more importantly her heart - is a mess. She feels inadequate and empty.

Truth is, that’s how a lot of us are, aren’t we? We have this persona that we show on the outside, but on the inside...oh my...that’s a whole different story. We have our struggles. Our emptiness. Yearning for something that is missing inside of us that tugs our souls daily. Real life. Some of us struggle with this. It is a fact. We feel all alone. No one would love the “real” me. How could they?

What is cool is that the is someone who loves all of those shitty parts of you. Of me. Of everyone. Unconditionally. Those shitty parts that you try and hide though your outward appearance. That “person&…

Persistence

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Dear Jen,
     I am your Persistence, and there are a few things that I have been meaning to talk to you about. Things I want you to remember. Things that need to be said.
     Whenever you are feeling doubtful or unsure of yourself, I want you to read this and realize the gifts that I have given you since you were just a little girl. When you feel sad, mad, or scared, read this list. If you need courage or think that there is something that you cannot do. Read on.
     Remember that I am always part of you...you just have to think of me...and I will appear. I am all in your mind, but I assure you that this is a good thing. A great thing. Promise.

     Let me tell you some of the things that I have done for you:

When you were a little girl, you started to crawl, then walk...and then I helped you ride your first bike. Yeah, that was me.Reading, writing. Playing the saxophone and getting first chair. Yup, me too.Remember when you finally got your first “A” in the 4th grade and then you r…

My Morning Routine and Why Getting Up Early Can Change Your Life

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I wake up at 4:14 to 4:30 every weekday morning for 2 very simple reasons: My well-being and my health. While getting my butt up this early really sucks sometimes, I would not give it up for pretty much anything (unless there is some emergency or I am sick or something). On the weekends, I have the same routine, but I just start a little later.

I get up, I make my delicious better than SBux coffee and I sit my but down on my chair in the living room with all of my books and sometimes my laptop (like this morning). First book is typically my gratitude journal where I write down 3 things that I am grateful for. My only rule is that they have to be different each day and they have to be specific. Like one of today’s was: I am thankful for how adorable my mother is. Her antics are so precious and she makes me smile every day.

Next books are my 2 different Jesus Calling Books and maybe a chapter out of whatever other book I have decided to read. Then my prayer journal where I just write ou…

The Woman Inside You

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The real you. She’s been patiently waiting to come out. She’s the you that lives deep within. The one who wants the current “you” to come out and play. To live a little. To make those changes. To take that chance. To show your creative side.

I think that most of us get into these routines in our lives where we get so focused on just getting through the day, that we forget about actually taking the time to do those things that call us that we really want to do. That our souls want us to do. We live our lives on autopilot. We just don’t make the time. A class that sounds interesting. A new hairstyle. A painting that we have envisioned. A project. A book. A vacation. A cause. A vision.
Oh, I will do it when...
Then all of the sudden, 30 years have passed and one day we wake up and realize that we forgot to live. We wake up and look in the mirror and wonder who the hell this woman is standing in front of us. What happened to her? Her dreams and aspirations? The real her? Dammit. I want a …

A New Year - New Goals

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Ahhhh...the new year. A fresh start. A turned page. A new you. Endless possibilities are before you. A good time to reinvent yourself. Make those changes. Do all of those things you have been wanting to do...since last year. But alas, this year - dang it- is going to be different. You are going to stick with the plan and do it!

I think that taking the time to dream and think about what you want to do and how you are going to go about doing it is a good thing. What kind of changes do you want to make? What kind of person do you want to be? Now is a good time to take a pen and write them down. Carve out some alone time where no one else can disturb you and dream!! Write out your goals and then write about what steps you have to take to get them accomplished. The latter part of that is the extra step that most people don’t take, but it will help you have a clearer direction.

You want to lose weight? Write it down...and then formulate a plan on how you will accomplish this.

Example: My Goa…

Dear Fear

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Dear Fear,

I recognize that you are present. I can feel you. I know you are there telling me that what I am about to do just isn’t going to work. No one will listen. People will think I am stupid. I am wasting my time. 
You are trying to make me feel too scared to take that chance. To make that bold move. You want me to believe that I will fail. That I should just stick to my career and not venture out into other things. It's the only thing that I am good at, anyways. Nothing else.
You are attempting to keep me up at night so that I can worry about things that you make me think you are controlling. 
You are striving to make me think that I am not good enough. Not strong enough. Not talented enough. You are the voice in the back of my mind that is beckoning me to give up. Don’t even try cause it’s going to be too hard. I don’t have time, anyway.
I want YOU to know that while I acknowledge your presence, I am NOT going to let you control me. I am the author of my life and you only …